Leading Centre for world class Assisted Reproductive Services in Nigeria.

Fertility Talk With Dr Abayomi Ajayi: Dealing With The Disappointment Of Not Conceiving In Time (Part 2)

Fertility Talk With Dr Abayomi Ajayi: Dealing With The Disappointment Of Not Conceiving In Time (Part 2)

Abayomi Ajayi

Many women are only able to bear all the treatments they go through because their husbands stand by them all the way. The same thing works out conversely. Practical issues can also help you work with, not against, each other.

Work together and find ways to share the burden. If certain gatherings or celebrations are too painful for you, give yourself permission to avoid them when you’re having a particularly tough time. If there is an occasion you just can’t avoid, arrive late or leave early. In view of the fact that society often fails to recognize the grief caused by infertility, those affected tend to hide how they feel, which only leads to feelings of shame and isolation.

It could be helpful to find other people who are going through the same thing, or talking to people who work in the field of infertility, can help you see that you are not alone. Talk to each other and to others. Women undergoing IVF who openly discuss their emotions have a higher pregnancy rate than those who don’t.

Of course you can’t go on with treatments forever, so you need to know when to start and when to stop. One woman confessed, after several years of fruitless attempts, that when her husband came home and said he’d made an appointment to see a social worker to discuss adoption, she felt relieved and “an incredible peace of mind, because she felt one way or another they would become parents.”

Some people choose to adopt after being diagnosed with unexplained infertility. Naturally before embarking on assisted reproduction treatment for infertility, you need to decide just how much you’re willing to pay. This is a wise step because infertility treatment can be an expensive business.

Couples in which the woman is aged 23 to 39, and who have been trying for a baby for two years, may need to dip deeply into their life savings since there is virtually little or nothing by way of existing health insurance offering help for infertile couples.

For those who decide to seek treatment privately, as many couples often do, it is important to always ask in advance what the full cost of each treatment cycle is likely to be. Look for the hidden costs of taking time off work and travel expenses – you may need to make many journeys to the clinic.

Once you know how much your treatment is likely to cost, agree with your partner how much money you are prepared to spend in total. If your first round of treatment does not work, could you afford another? Having a baby may be a priceless gift, but pushing yourselves into financial logjam would only add to the stresses you already face.

A good advice is to take care of yourself by pursuing other interests. While being treated for infertility can feel like a full- or at least part-time job, it’s important to keep up with some of the activities or hobbies that bring you pleasure. It won’t be easy, it won’t be cheap, but it would be worthwhile. And that is the ultimate.