Waiting to achieve conception can be extremely stressful and frustrating. You may find that your mood swing from day to day: between hope, despair and anger. “Why should this happen to me?” Many people find their own way of coping with the pressures and disappointments but generally we would advice on the following;

Realise that what you are going through is a life crisis. This may be one of the hardest situations you will ever face. It calls to question the most fundamental expectations you have for yourself, your body and your relationships. It is not unusual to feel a sense of loss and to be overwhelmed.

Read as much as you can and do not be afraid to ask questions. Talking with your doctor and understanding your options enables you to make informed choices.

Fertility has no guarantees. Try to maintain an open mind while considering your options.

Negative thoughts make things worse. When you start thinking like “what could have or what should have been”, try to remind yourself that few fertility problems are entirely one partner’s fault in terms of what one did or did not do. Many problems are determined by inheritance and many others by multiple factors related to the couple as a whole. So try to concentrate on the present and the future.

Do not take it out on your spouse. Rather, sympathise with each other and be sensitive to your collective emotional needs. This will strengthen your relationship whilst you wait.

If certain gatherings or celebrations, such as christening or birthdays are too painful, take permission to skip them. Family and friends will understand.

 Find others with the same issues, who understand your problems and are willing to help.